Today is a weird day. I woke up and was in such a SUPER mood..the sun was shining, the sky was blue and there was a beautiful breeze blowing. I felt like I couldn't feel any better than this.

I went grocery shopping with my mummy. We walked to Westmall...I've never felt so happy to walk to Westmall before. I was in a light breezy mood all the time. I happily pranced around the supermarket, gathering ingredients for the soup that I was gonna make. We got to take a cab home...which made me feel even better.

The soup turned out to be pretty yummy...which was good, since it's one of the only things I know how to make from scratch. Then got a few emails that I was happy to reply to. So everything was cool!

Then Kheng Hui smsed to ask if I wanted to go over for a swim. I was all ready to go over...when my mummy suggested he come over instead...since my pool is always empty and for some reason, she got the idea that I was planning to walk over to his place in a swimsuit. RIGHT...like that would ever happen. I'm not exactly proud of the way I look in a swimsuit..though I really really love my new swimsuits. Both the black one and the pink one. It was like yesterday. We mostly sat in the pool talking...we swam like nearly NOT AT ALL! No sunburn today though. :) Just brown.

We went over to his place later...then we headed over to Holland V to meet Jiat Ling. Thai Express wasn't too bad. They have too many service staff though...like they never heard of the Law of Diminishing Returns. Pity there wasn't enough rice. The gravy was quite yummy...but no point eating it alone, without rice. The tom yam soup that Kheng Hui ordered was super spicy. He was totally sweating...poor boy! Oh, and Jiat Ling gave me a Hippo! I don't know what to call it yet. All my toys come in families, says Ying Han...well, quite true ;). We decided on going to Coffee Club for dessert. We shared "Triple Chocolate a la mode", "Muddy Mud Pie" and "Apple Crumble a la mode". What the f**k is it with "a la mode"...sounds so CHEESY! Anyway, we ate so much that we were ready to explode. I am not gonna look at ice cream and cake for the next 2 days at least!

Well...so what on earth got me suddenly so depressed? Well, I decided to go online and write the fake reference letter for my friend. While I was doing that, I got an email from someone. Somehow it made me feel very depressed. Like I can't sustain anyone's interest like that. Like I'm so boring. Well...like I'll never have luck in love. That I'm a major loser in this department. Oh, I'm a loser in many departments already...this just tops it all off. I once thought I was immune to these kinds of things. Love's not for me...so I thought. Yet when I don't get it...I feel like I've fallen into the pits of hell. I hurt the people who care for me and I yearn for those I cannot have. What's wrong with me? At this rate, I'll just end up a desperate loser, or a frigid bitch. Both are not good options. I just wanna have a good cry and forget about all this. I'll keep my feelings to myself next time. I don't need all of this unfeeling, indifferent crap. I can do that just fine on my own, thanks.

Got an interview tomorrow morning. Sian. Not in the mood anymore. But maybe keeping busy with other things will take my mind off the pain and misery.