Ok, coffee makes me totally restless! I can barely sit still...and all I drank was ONE cappucino. Ok, it might also be because I left the house for the first time since Monday...so many days of staying at home and not doing anything else. I'm surprised that I survived these past days, but I guess it's kinda easy to settle into a routine: wake up, shower, have breakfast, work on my translation, prepare lunch, have lunch, start revision, watch TV, prepare dinner, have dinner, revise and watch tv, sleep. Sometimes I take a nap...but only for 30 min, so it doesn't really affect my day at all.

I met my "boss" for the first time today...the one who's been giving me translation work. We actually had no idea what each other looked like, but resourceful ol' me decide to check the company website and surprise surprise, there was a photo of him there. Have to admit that he doesn't exactly look like his photo. Maybe I shocked him when I simply came up from behind and said "Hallo, ich bin die Samantha" without even asking if he was the right person. But, he managed to hide his surprise well. He didn't even ask me how I knew it was him. Maybe he was just relieved that he didn't have to be the one trying to find out which person was Samantha. He's very nice, just as the guy who introduced me to the job said. But erm, it was kinda weird cos I'm totally afraid of these awkward silences. I probably also talked a lot cos I haven't actually talked to any living, breathing person in a while...not a proper conversation anyway. I hope I didn't scare him. Haha. He brought me peanut cake too...so nice! I prefer pineapple tarts, but how was he to know anyway? But yay! Nice food to eat!

Oh...and man...they switched the tramlines again...a gazillion detours again...I had no idea where I could take my tram from...:( But in the end, I managed to figure out lah...phew! I'd forgotten how often the tram lines in Dresden change.

Ok lah, should really start studying for my exams...

As if I needed another reminder of how the years have flown by..sigh..haha...this is my cute little sister, who is going to be sweet 16 this year...she's with 2 of my babies...Mary Monkey Boo and Mary Monkey Boo the second. You can't see them both in the photo though...just one and the hair of the other. It pained me unendlessly to have to throw them away, one after another. Actually, I hid the second one for a long time, in a black trash bag...for years after my mum insisted I throw her away. But it was tough. And when I felt scared or upset, I'd reach for the black trash bag and hug Mary. Now Mary's gone...and for a long time too, but remembering how we used to be inseparable back then kinda brings tears to my eyes. Maybe time does heals your wounds...or at least you forget. I hope this will happen to memories of sad partings with living, breathing human beings too. But then again, is there any way of remembering happy events without thinking the painful thoughts that are associated in some way? I didn't mean to bring this up, but I suddenly thought about how things were quite different this time last year. It was an exciting time in my life...you know, all that excitement about liking someone and hoping they like you back...like a cautious and intricate mating dance (maybe this is the wrong analogy)...funny how things are so different now eh? But I'll admit that there's a silver lining: I realised how stupid I was then...and I hope I don't make the same mistakes again, should I ever get into a similar situation later.

I spent nearly the whole of yesterday reading "Invisible Trade". Admittedly, I've always had a thing for books on the sex industry. Not that I ever aspire to be part of that trade, but there's something fascinating about the profession. It's interesting to hear the personal life stories, what the people feel about their profession, why they do it...and often, there are many sob stories...it has to do with need and often, also self-destruction and shame. The line between job and pleasure...where do you draw it? How do you turn your feelings off? How can you differentiate between client and lover? Why do some men propose to prostitutes/call girls/escorts etc. So many questions which cannot be answered...but are continually discussed. I wanna know more!

Could go on forever, but have to bathe now and have dinner!

8.14am on a Monday morning. Do not have to go to school anymore! Yay!! Haha...but it is sorta bad too, because I'll just sit at home and basically rot the whole day and stuff myself with food. Still, I like the feeling of not having to go anywhere if I don't want to. The ground is covered in snow, thanks to 1-2 days of snow...and you all know I'm not such a big fan of snow (not once December ends, anyway)..ok, I'll have to go do grocery shopping later, but I'm only going after noon. Why? Weeeeeell, some idiots decided to play "destroy the letterboxes" again. I don't think it's personal, cos it's always different ones which get damaged, but I hate it cos I worry about my mail...and I'm due to receive some stuff in the course of the week (if it didn't already come on Saturday and get stolen by the vandals). This is at least the second time...could've been more, but I try to suppress unhappy memories. Oh blah...I wonder why people have to destroy other people's property...what on earth is the logic in that? Especially things belonging to people whom you've never met and who've never done you any wrong. Man...

So anyway, I will have to wait till the postman comes, in case I get any book/parcel deliveries...because if the Hausmeister doesn't repair the letterbox by then, someone might steal the notice and collect it from the post office "on my behalf". I am not very happy that they don't check your ID most of the time...I mean then if I got my hands on someone else's delivery notice, I could go collect it and no one would check! And that person wouldn't know that he never got it!

Am desperately trying to finish reading my stuff for the Anglistik Zwischenprüfung now. Spent yesterday reading a Grammar of Singapore English, edited by Lisa Lim. It is so detailed man...and what the hell is "Voice Onset Time"? I think I'm pissed off cos I know so little...I feel desperately inadequate. But it's really interesting to read...apart from some weird terms and crazy diagrams, which I don't understand. I'm kinda behind schedule though. I planned to finish reading it yesterday, but I'm only halfway through...well, at least it's interesting! :D Have to be optimistic! I'm just worried that I won't remember what I've read...which will be such a pity, cos it's such interesting information!

Cooked chicken rice yesterday...man, I love the smell...it reminds me of home! The rice was kinda gooey, but it still tasted fine!

I found some bugs or baby cockroaches in my room yesterday. Ugh!! I killed as many as I could, but most of them got away! Man, I am gonna KILL them if I ever see anymore...I HATE the idea of a cockroach-infested room and if it means being cruel to cockroaches, I'll do it.

Ok, back to work!