I can't believe it. I never thought it would happen to me a second time. Just after getting out of a relationship and sort of feeling put off by such things, I end up getting close to some other guy. I never know what they see in me, but of course I'm happy..though hesitant. Do I fall in "love" and out of it again too easily? Maybe I'm deluded. I mean I had some kinda distant inkling that he liked me, but I couldn't be sure, cos well...how can you ever be 100% about such things. We just talked from 7pm to 12 midnight...and somewhere in between when we were talking about premarital sex (no, not about doing it..just about statistics and whether you would tend do it if your friends are doing it) and that my grandmother kept asking me how come Sherry has a boyfriend and I don't, and about staying in Dresden, he suddenly blurted out, "Well, I don't know if it's obvious to you, but I like you quite a bit. Do you think we could work out a long-distance relationship?" Cos he may stop studying in Dresden and go back to Munich next semester. Sigh. What a tragic start! But who knows. Actually, I guess I'd be quite ok. I mean I would have my freedom, but then again I wouldn't see him much at all. What a headache! I looked kinda embarrassed after that and tried to change the subject when he reached over for my hand. Anyway, cos we'd talked till so late, he offered me his sofa and a t-shirt to change into. We ended up talking till 1.45am and then we woke up at 11am..but continued lying down till 12pm. Don't worry though...absolutely NOTHING happened. He's a good, decent guy and as he admitted, he's never kissed a girl before. So sweet. Then we had cake for breakfast/lunch...then we watched a few episodes of The Simpsons. Time just flew by! I guess cos we had lots of stuff to talk about. Then Liu Jian called me to ask if I'd forgotten our cake baking appointment...so I had to leave. He said he'd help me carry my luggage to the airport on Monday. That's very nice of him. Good thing he doesn't have practical on Monday...if not I'd have to drag my luggage to the airport somehow. I don't know what to feel now. I don't know where it goes from here. Sigh.

Our banana-pineapple cake smells great! I wasn't hungry just now, but now I am. Guess I'll go have a piece.

The oral exam yesterday was really stressful. My partner and I both turned red when we were talking to each other...man! Our topic was whether National Service, military or otherwise, should be obligatory for men or women or both or neither. It was ok. Better than whether Germans are different from other European nationalities or 'How has the world changed since September 11th?' Well, apparently, the content wasn't worth that much anyway. But the whole thing was really casual and funny...we even strayed from the topic a few times, but everyone was in good humour.

Then came the results. 1.0 in general, but 1.3 for pronunciation and intonation, cos of devoicing. Erm. I forgot what that is. But ok. I know I'm not perfect. I got 1.0 in general for the "Use of English" part. I had 93%...and some mistakes were just plain dumb. I didn't read carefully. The essay was 1.3. So I have to say that I'm pretty pleased in general. Ms Lindsay and Mr Hollingsworth said that they hadn't seen results like that before. Ms Lindsay said they should kill me, stuff me and put me in a glass cupboard at the institute just to show people that it was possible. Haha. And Mr Hollingsworth told Ms Lindsay to tell me that I could take the GLC 4s next semester. Yay! Cos normally I can't take them till I've passed the intermediate exam. Yeah! :)

Then I went shopping...cos I was so happy...talked to Ms Lindsay on the tram. I bought 2 rings at less than half price..and another swimsuit. Haha...yes, why do I need 2? I really really liked this one. Always wanted something like that...oops...this is like the millionth time I've said that. Ruth'll give me this sceptical look if she were here. I wanted to buy presents for my sisters...but nothing really appealed to me that they'd like.

After shopping, I came home and watched TV, getting all ready to make pizza! Liu Jian came down and she and Fu Wei and I started messing up the Waschraum with our preparations. We used lap cheong and salami and a kind of German sausage and ham, along with broccoli, pineapple, red capsicum and tomatoes...and mushrooms. Yummy! We finally finished at like 7.30 or so...and invited Liu Jian's husband down to eat with us. Then he went back up to study and we started playing Ligretto...and making a lot of noise. I wondered why I kept winning most of the time...cos I usually suck at these games which involve quick reflexes...then I realised that I wasn't playing by the same rules as Fu Wei and Liu Jian. Haha. So embarrassing. I immediately apologized once I realised it. But fortunately, I still won the next game, although I had to try to get used to the new and correct rules.

We had so much fun, that we decided that we'd meet up again on Saturday evening to bake cakes and play more games. Fu Wei and Liu Jian are gonna borrow other games from friends of theirs...and we can play the whole night through! :) Maybe I won't be so bored during the next few days after all.

Seems everyone has something at least mildly interesting to say on their blogs. I just report the events of my mundane life. But maybe I like it this way. I like keeping my secrets to myself most of the time. Some are better left that way. I don't know if it's cos they make me feel vulnerable...or maybe my thoughts are just simple, and more often than not, have no link to the current situation.

I've been trying to go shower for the last half an hour...but it's still occupied. I'm getting nervy and lazy. I wanna feel clean when I go for my exam in 45 minutes. I don't wanna go with oily hair. I'm scared already. I've never liked oral exams...and when I heard how strict the examiners were, I just freaked out. What can I do? I hope it goes ok and I come back feeling better.

To be honest, I've sorta been in a semi-depressive cloud recently. I don't know why. Like I'm floating around aimlessly..although I have a ton of things to do, if I think about it carefully. Instead..I just eat, sleep and read. I've finally finished reading "The Accidental Tourist" by Anne Tyler. I've wanted to read it since I was 14 and we read the opening chapter for a novel writing class. But I never got down to it. So I count myself lucky that I found the German translation at 2.95 Euros at the train station at Cottbus. And now I'm done. It's really not bad. It's heart-wrenching really. Though of course, I didn't understand every word.

Maybe the depression of falling out of love has something to do with it. I meet a guy who likes me despite my inadequacies. But I hate him for his. How can I be so shallow? Can't I ignore other people's opinions? But honestly, I don't think what other people have said influences me. I feel like Martha, in "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?". Wanting her husband to succeed, instead of languishing in mediocrity, Martha pushes him hard...too hard? So hard that his will breaks? I don't know. Maybe I know I have weaknesses, but I depise those of others so as to distract myself from my own. I forget the term for this. Maybe I'll never be satisfied with what I have. Maybe I always want better...though I don't possess the qualifications nor am I in the right conditions. Who knows. Why do I want more? Most of me prefers to be happy with my lot in life...and when I think about it, I am really privileged. I'm not rich, but I can have most of what I want within reason. I'm not a straight A student, but I do ok in school, if I put my mind to it. I don't have many friends, but I like those that I have. I don't have any talents, but I'm lucky most of the time...get chances that other people don't get offered and chances that I probably didn't deserve to get either. Why am I complaining? The sad thing is really, the more people have, the more they desire. What a sad fact. It's time to break out of the vicious cycle!

Snow! There's no more of it! Haha. All gone! No more snow for the winter...for me anyway.

Sunday was quite a disastrous day. The toilet was spoilt and we had no idea how to fix it. So we let it flow like Niagara Falls the whole day and night. Until I figured out that it had something to do with a valve or whatever you call it. Probably still have to call the housemaster lah...dunno what exactly is wrong.

Then, I made an omelette for my sushi. It broke up into little bits...very unpresentable. But it didn't look so bad in the sushi. Then I nearly burnt my fingers off handling the rice...cos I didn't have much time to let it cool. *ouch* But I finally made it...and wrapped it in not very clingy cling wrap. Which was a real blessing in disguise. Cos...I decided to vacuum my room to make it cleaner. But I forgot the dust filter...and ended up spraying my whole room with dust instead. I mean literally the whole room! Every open surface had dust on it. Including my blanket, pillows and bedsheet. So I quickly stripped off the covers and dumped them into a laundry bag. I dusted all my toys off too and put them into bags as well. Then I wiped all the possible surfaces that needed dusting. (what an ironic choice of verb...you dust to get dust off? Hmm...) Then I tried to empty my vacuum cleaner of the dust that had gotten stuck inside. It was hot and I was stressed. Was sweating and who should suddenly appear and give me a shock? Max... Well, since he asked me how he could help, I asked him to accompany me to the basement to get the laundry done. He was amazed how the whole building shares 2 washing machines and 1 dryer. Then we cooked Laksa. I burned the paste. Sigh. But managed to rescue it anyway. It tasted ok but not spicy enough. He told me that he used to have long hair. So hard to imagine. Well, good thing he got it cut. Guys with long hair, besides 5566, freak me out. It was a pretty good evening otherwise...once the catastrophies stopped happening. Then we watched Infernal Affairs. I swear that I've never gotten bored of the movie, although I've watched it at least 7 times. Max agreed it was good...but very complicated. This Friday, it's his turn to cook. We may end up eating frozen pizza. Haha. Liu Jian, Fu Wei and I are gonna make pizza from scratch on Thursday...a pizza party! I bought a new card game too...we'll have pizza and play games. Great for distracting myself. I just can't wait to go home.

On Monday morning, I had my Basic Level Preliminary Language Exam. The essay sucked and I have no idea how the translation turned out. But I managed to pass the written part. Received a major shock first though. I couldn't find my matriculation number on the list of the pple who had passed. I thought I was gonna die. So I went to look for Mr Hollingsworth, who was handing out the papers to those who'd failed. At first we just looked at each other without saying anything. I suppose he wondered what I was doing there. Then I stammered...erm...my number is not on the list...and he said, you did well. Well, good anyway. Hmm...so it turns out that my number was written WRONGLY! So I will take the oral exam tomorrow. Steffi took the exam today and boy were they strict. I don't think her English is that bad. I've heard a whole lot worse! Sigh. I'm freaking out. If they give me a 3 or 4, I think I will die. Well I won't...but I'll be depressed for a long time. I hope the topic is better too. I can't talk about how Germany is different from other European countries. I have NOOOO IDEA!

Steffi came over after her oral exam, then we went to Karstadt for lunch. I think I ate till I was way too full...but since it was Steffi's treat, it wasn't nice to leave lots of food on the plate. Then we went around trying perfumes...most of them sucked. Haha. I still like Escada Sentiment though. But I'd never be able to afford perfumes...or better said, I can't bear to spend money on them. Though the idea of walking into a room and drenching it with a cloud of wonderful smelling perfume is positively enticing. Then we went on search for a swimsuit for me...I didn't wanna spend so much money, so we went to the cheaper Karstadt (there are 2 in Dresden..just across the street from each other) and after looking at lots of ugly ones, I found one I really really liked! It's black with a pink flower on it. It's perfect, except for the back. I prefer a racerback swimsuit, but they only had one Speedo...and it wasn't very nice...and cost 30 Euros. The black one cost 9 Euros. It was funny though. There didn't seem to be much difference between the 40B and 42C. I took the smaller one in the end, cos the suits tend to get bigger in water. I didn't wanna get a bikini...although they were cheaper. Can't imagine swimming in one..and erm, I don't think I'd like to see myself in one...let alone all the other poor people who'd think I was a real eyesore.

CAN'T WAIT TO GO HOME. I am dying of impatience! Help! Well...maybe I'll feel better tomorrow. I have the exam at 1pm and then we have that pizza party. On Friday I'll bake a cake, then go over to Max's. I don't know his surname. Don't know why I didn't ask. Haha. I will ask this time. I have nothing on Saturday. Maybe go shopping again or go on a walk somewhere. So hard to wait...wish I could've flown home earlier. Then I can see Christine and Han for longer. BUt too bad...cannot...:(

Me and a Snowwoman in the Great Garden! 

The last week of school was pretty...ugh. The first class on Monday was like "damn! why didn't I just NOT skip class the last time"...if not I would've known that I have to bring the Schein and cos I didn't know about it...I have to go to the lecturer during one of her holiday office hours..which I don't know if I can make or not. I just skipped the one in the afternoon, cos I already got my Schein for that. Tuesday was uneventful...or at least I forgot what I did. Oh yes. I ran up and down campus running errands like transferring money to the Uni for the next semester, going to the library (I forgot what I was there for!!) and going to my institute in hope that I would somehow bump into my lit lecturer and ask her if she had marked my paper. Just so happens that she was there! She told me to come back the next day and she'd have my paper. So ok..good...accomplished some stuff. Been really unproductive these days.

From Wednesday onwards, I was kept quite busy. I got my results for Basic Writing. 1.3. I'm quite grateful for the 1.3, since I got a 1.7 on one of the essays we had to do about having no future without English. I suppose the 1s on the first and last essay helped the overall grade. Then 2 of us followed the instructor to her office to get stamps for the language exam that we're taking on Monday. She said she was in Singapore 15 years ago. (The instructor, I mean) She's going to Boston, which is covered in snow...and she wonders why she's doing it..since it's already freezing here in Dresden. Had my last class in "Partition of the Indian Subcontinent" after that. We (the class + lecturer) arranged to meet at Jaipur, this Indian restaurant in the Neustadt, on Friday evening. I was there once before while the crew was here in Dresden. The food was ex! After class, I went to collect my paper. 1.3...ok lah. I didn't expect much. Just glad that she was willing to mark it at all. Then, went home and baked muffins..coconut and chocolate chip. Quite interesting! Then met Angeline at Cinemaxx to watch "Phantom of the Opera". We kept laughing at all the cheesy bits. Haha. We snuck in Cheetos and muffins. Yummy!

On Thursday, I don't remember what I did in the day, but I made satay for dinner. Since there was no grill, it didn't really taste like satay. AND I'd managed to burn the sauce and poke myself with a satay stick. What a disaster!

Friday morning, I went to return the damn books that I borrowed for the Transsexuality paper. So glad to be rid of them! Major relief man! Then I went grocery shopping for the weekend. Didn't end up buying many things, but I'll survive till tomorrow. After the exam, I'll go grocery shopping again. Less stress and more time this time. Gotta buy chocs and all that. Won't have any space for real souvenirs this time. My luggage is like already near bursting point...and I haven't even put everything I need to inside. How? Sigh.

I nearly couldn't find Jaipur! The silly street was so long and I couldn't remember the number. I didn't remember what the phone number for the place was, and I didn't know anyone's mobile number either. But I saw this friendly looking lady and I asked her for directions. She had no clue, so she asked some other guys...so I just walked and walked till I found it. I was on the correct street...just that it was right on the other end of the street from the tram station. Anyway, when I got there, nearly everyone was there. But not the food. The food took forever to come. I got there at 7.30-pm...the rest were there at 7 or so. The food came like AFTER NINE PM!! So when we left, it was like past 11pm already. I went back with Ellen, this girl studying art. Her boyfriend is PRC. Well, you always see a lot of white guys with asian chicks...but rarely the opposite way around. It's nice to see something different for a change. She's even gone to meet his parents in China. How cool is that?

Yesterday and today were lazy days. Just ate and lay down or watched tv most of the time. I am so greedy today. Maybe it's pre-exam stress. Hope the cravings will go away after tomorrow's exam. I ate so much chocolate in the past 2 days..although I rarely eat chocolate these days. I've fulfilled my quota, I hope.

Max is coming for dinner. Gonna make laksa. Hope it's more successful than last time. Silly internet is not stable. Had to use the terminator to get internet. I hope the others don't need internet at this point.

WIll feel better after exams...I hope.